Monday, August 7, 2017

DP E131--Just One of Those Episodes!




What to do when you're stuck on a plane. Especially if it smells like feet, Doritos, and ass. Call 911 and tell them about the evils of high fructose corn syrup, the corporate takeover of America, and the secret of the Revolution (hint: take a page out of the anti-tobacco freedom fighters). Believe it or not, Paul and Steve cover these themes and Paul manages to go on an epic anti-processed food rant. Then they fill the second half with headlines - human embryo editing, why Stephen King is way over-rated, and why Charlize Theron is a better African American actress than Halle Berry. Steve includes the bonus headline that expresses shock that a 45 year-old woman has a hot body.

DP E130--Why Your Mom Was Wrong!




That's right, dear listeners​​, your humble hosts hate to break it to you, but everything your mom told you was a lie.  Your politeness is killing people, from bicycle crossings to dating, Steve and Paul try to help clear a few things up.  And if they can't, the 130,000 Year Old Mastodon will!  Also in this episode, everything from how Steve is going to make a career for a psychiatrist one day, to a one-armed clown with a machete, as well as a Facebook Question of the Week, and Irresponsible Headline Interpretations!  And, remember, nothing you hear is true!

Remember to subscribe on iTunes or Apple Podcasts. 

Monday, July 17, 2017

DP E128--The Truth & Other Alternate Facts!


DP E128--The Truth & Other Alternate Facts!

The Don't Panic Radio Show doesn't care about your feelings, and artists don't care about your facts.  In this episode, Steve and Paul recount the day Steve accepted ZZ Top into his life.  After that, this episode goes straight into the toilet.  Literally.  Also in this week's episode, The Rapture, narcoleptic fork truck drivers, cigarettes, Kent State and the 80s, what aren't they teaching kids in school these days?  All this and the Facebook Question of the Week.  Remember, nothing you hear is true!
 
Support the troops.

Sunday, July 16, 2017

DP E127 (Redux)--Hoosier Daddies!


DP E127 (Redux)--Hoosier Daddies!

No, you didn't read that wrong.  This isn't a rerun.  Not a hoax.  We just miscounted a few weeks ago, and we're trying to put things right.  That said...

Brace yourself for the most hilarious take on fathering daughters you may ever hear as Steve makes his triumphant return from his brief hiatus.  Hiatus?!  He barely knew us!  Also in this week's show, Steve and Paul pay tribute and bid ado  to their spiritual step-brother podcast, the Do It Indy Radio Hour as only they can.  Afterwards, our hosts continue discussing dad stuff from where Paul and SFJ left off last week.  All this, plus Irresponsible Headline Interpretations, the 130,000 year old Mastodon , and an all new caller!  It's a regular zoo this time around.​

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

DP E129--Favorite Bad Movies!



This week, while Steve is on vacation, Paul and Superfan James talk dad stuff, dad noises The Arrival, and other bad movies they love.  The Facebook Question of the Week, not coincidentally: Favorite "bad" movie?  What follows is listeners chiming in with everything from Hudson Hawk to Xanadu.  Also in this episode Paul tries to explain Don't Panic to new listeners, and he and SFJ give Steve the credit he deserves for doing what he does week after week.  All this, and more, in this week's episode.

Sunday, June 25, 2017

DP E128--Podcast Host Killed by Fidget Spinner!


Just follow the link below to learn the ugly truth!


Or click the link below to listen on YouTube!


It was just a matter of time.  This week, Steve and Paul discuss everything from Ju Ju Beans and Fidget Spinners, to NPR and Watchmen.  Along the way, your fearless hosts discuss words you can no longer say if you're any kind of decent human being, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Mein Kampf, Steve's apparent inability to differentiate Gerard Butler from almost any other actor, and exploding cream dispensers.  Yep, it's one of those kind of shows.

As always, thanks for listening, liking, following, telling a friend, and just being an all-around righteous person.  And, remember, nothing you hear is true!
 
Time codes:
 
01:00--Ju Ju Beans and other words you can and cannot say anymore.
10:00--The Do It NPR Radio Hour!
13:00--The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Don't Panic Radio Show.
15:00--The NPR morning show with David Sedaris & The Turd!
17:00--Steve Watches the Watchmen.
26:00--Poe & the Mysteriads!
27:00--Musical interlude.
33:00--The 130,000 Year Old Mastodon calls NPR.
39:00--Irresponsible Headline Interpretations! 
48:00--Facebook Question of the Week!

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

DP Episode 124--How to Win at Minecraft!



Superfan James rejoins Steve and Paul for an update of his experience on Autcraft, the version of Minecraft that has been set up for those with Autism and their families.  Also on this week's episode, the usual stuff: Irresponsible Headline Interpretations, whatever happened to Atari, and will Amazon's buying up of Whole Foods cause a rise in letters to Penthouse Forum?  And for that matter, whatever happened to Penthouse Forum?  As always, thanks for listening, and remember, nothing you heard was true!

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

DP E 123--Don't Panic About Wonder Woman!

DP E 123--Don't Panic About Wonder Woman!

This one's for the ladies.

This week, Steve and Paul spend the entire episode reviewing the Wonder Woman movie, and discuss the most powerful women in their lives.  Your intrepid hosts gave you fair warning, and ample time to see the movie, because spoilers abound in this episode.

No time codes this week, because there was really only one topic: Powerful women.

Tuesday, June 6, 2017

DP Episode 122--Brace Yourself, The Race Is On!



WARNING!  This episode is racially charged and may not be suitable to more sensitve listeners.  Wait, who are we kidding, our listeners aren't sensitive, or they wouldn't be our listeners.  But, trust your interpid hosts with this one, it'll all make sense in the end.  Once you've figured out how, let us know.  We're still a bit confused.

Also in this week's episode: What's weirder than saying "Happy Memorial Day?"  What's the difference between Memorial Day and Labor Day?  How do you stay sober at the Indy 500?  This episode asks the hard questions.  Plus, we have a Wonder Woman preview, Irresponsible Headline Interpretations, and a new spin on the Facebook Question of the Week.

This episode of Don't Panic was brought to you by cigarettes!  Because nothing calms you down like a good cigarette.

Time codes:
01:00--Youtubers...
02:00--Being sober at the Indy 500
13:00--All rise for the National Anthem
19:00--Facebook Question of the Week
20:00--Wonder Woman preview
30:00--Musical Interlude
32:00--Evangelical neighbors
46:00--Irresponsible Headline Interpretations

Monday, May 29, 2017

DP Episode 121--Understanding Autism


Following the usual mischief of the first half of the show, the guys at Don't Panic have a moment of clarity this week, and tackle a serious topic: Autism.  How can Minecraft, that silly, online video game that every kid in the world wastes so much time on actually benefit those with Autism? Special guest Superfan James opens up to share a personal part of his life. And he shares his plan to grow the bond he has with his young son by sharing a game and a world that he loves.

If you want to better understand autism on a real-world, personal level, skip to the "Autism & Minecraft" segment @ 30:00

Time codes:

01:00--Kids with man buns.
08:00--Superfan James has no pants.
10:00--Facebook Question of the Day asked.
11:00--130,000 Year Old Mastodon calls in.
15:00--Irresponsible Headline Interpretations.
26:00--Musical interlude.
30:00--Autism & Minecraft.
57:00--Facebook Question of the Day answers.

Follow the link below for the episode:

For more information on the Minecraft server SFJ mentions, go here:

If you are a bully or troll, go here:

ps Thank you, Superfan James. Your vulnerability and openness is sure to help increase understanding in a world that sure as hell needs it right now.

pps Get lost, 130,000 Year Old Mastodon. Steve's whisky is not your whisky. Plus it is not cool to smoke in somebody else's attic.

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

DP Episode 120--The Pre-Existing Condition of Human History


This week, Steve and Paul take on science!  Well, sort of.

Tune in as your hosts tackle the big issues, like science, religion, and what would happen if the Village People formed today.  Is IBS a pre-existing condition?  Did dinosaurs and humans coexist?  Tune in and find out!
Time codes:
02:00--Steve embraces his Middle Ages.
09:00--130,000 Year Old Mastodon calls in.
12:00--Steve experiences The Revolution.
19:00--Sixth grade history, then and now.
23:00--Facebook Question of the Week asked.
30:00--Musical interlude.
34:00--Irresponsible Headline Interpretations!
56:00--Facebook Question of the Week answered.

Just follow the link below for all the madness!

DP E120--Pre-Existing Conditions!

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

DP E119 -- The Long Pillow Con!


Better late than never is this week's episode of the Don't Panic Radio Show!  This week, learn how Steve's April Fool's Day prank came back to haunt him, and Paul does his best to not reveal spoilers for Guardians of the Galaxy 2.  Also on this episode, what happened to country music?!  The answer depends on your point of view.  As if that's not enough, Irresponsible Headline Interpretations, and a phone call from the 130,000 Year Old Mastodon. 

Episode 119 -- The Long Pillow Con!

Time Codes:
 
01:00 -- Steve's April Fool's Day prank comes back to haunt him
12:00 -- Guardians of the Galaxy 2
20:00 -- Musical Interlude
23:00 -- What happened to country music?!
28:00 -- A call from the 130,000 Year Old Mastodon
36:00 -- Headlines!
41:00 -- Facebook Question of the Week!

Sunday, May 7, 2017

Episode 118 -- Wonder Woman saves the DP!


This week, Steve and Paul continue to clean up the Don't Panic Radio Show's studios!   Also in this episode, Steve welcomes back Do It Indy Radio Hour in a big way, and tries to figure out how to celebrate Cinco De Mayo like a jefe!  Learn what happened to last week's Facebook Question of the Week!  As if that's not enough, Paul talks comics, specifically Captain America and Wonder Woman!  All this, and Irresponsible Headline Interpretations!
 
Time Codes:
 
01:00 - Steve welcomes back Do It Indy Radio Hour in a big way!
10:00 - How to celebrate Cinco De Mayo properly!
18:00 - Cleaning up the show!
27:00 - What happened to last week's Question of the Week?!
31:00 - Paul talks comics!
49:00 - Irresponsible Headline Interpretations!​


Monday, May 1, 2017

Episode 117--Revealing Secrets of Human History!


It's a kinder, gentler episode of the Don't Panic Radio Show, as your intrepid hosts try something different with the show.  At least for as long as they could, anyway.  In this episode, a 130,000 year old mastodon speaks his mind, Steve attempts to explain science, and Paul attempts to make sense out of whatever is going on at Marvel Comics.  Also in this episode, the secret to success, longevity, and other secrets are finally revealed!  
 
Time codes:
08:00--Steve's Rant of the Week
22:00--Irresponsible Headline Interpretations
47:00--Paul's Comic Book Rant

Episode 117--Secrets of Human History Revealed!

As always, thanks for listening, liking, telling a friend, and subscribing!

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Episode 116 -- 3rd annual Birthday Blast!


It's the 3rd annual birthday blast!

Join your hosts as they surround themselves by a host of friends in this extra large episode of the Don't Panic Radio show!.  That's right, Uncle Karl, Dee, Mrs. Dee, and Steve's Lovely Bride are back to help Steve and Paul celebrate their birthdays.  Listen as the Dysfunctional Duo look back on their days as Holy Rollin' Sonsabitches, try to get their Brat Pack movies straight, and debate the differences between a good old fashioned handjob, and a mechanical one.  Also in this episode, we ask the poignant questions: How many Jedi are there really?  How does Trump assert his manhood?  If your ex-girlfriend writes a tell-all book, do you really want to be in it?  And, the Facebook Question of the Week!  This time around, the FBQotW was on Facebook Live, so if you tuned into that, tune into this episode to see if we used your answer!

Just follow the link below!


As always, thanks for listening, liking, downloading, sharing, subscribing, and all of that other voodoo that you do so well!

Sunday, April 16, 2017

Episode 115 -- How to get jerked off by American Airlines!


It's an episode of versus this week!  Coke vs. Pepsi, art vs. product, and tea vs. Yoohoo just for starters.  Also this week, United Airlines will jerk you off, and Sean Spicer, stupid or evil?  Plus, WWWSS? (What would Wanda Sykes say?)  This week, Paul geeks out over X-Men Gold, and Steve proposes his own comic book idea.  It's a topical week, and Steve and Paul do their best to try and make sense out of it all.

Just click the link below!

Episode 115 -- How to get jerked off by American Airlines!


Monday, April 10, 2017

Episode 114 - How to Win the Lottery!


How do you win the lottery?  Find out this week on the Don't Panic Radio Show!

Also this week, the Don't Panic boys discuss Rogue One, which prompts the Facebook Question of the Week.  Steve and Paul discuss why we never took pictures of food before social media.   Also, Paul is going to hell, and learn why Steve is the M. Night Shyamalan of masturbation.  You won't believe the twist!  

All this and, of course, Irresponsible Headline Interpretations:  Why are Canadians three times more lucky than Americans?  Who really killed Tupac?  But, more importantly, who really even remembers Tupac?  Or cares?  Vegan restaurants hate boobs and money, and why you should never date a vegan.

Just follow the link below...


Or...






Monday, April 3, 2017

Episode 113 - Worst Job Ever!


This week, your humble hosts talk about the worst jobs they've ever had, what's the deal with having to wake up so damn early for work, and Steve makes Paul relive his nightmare in 'Nam.  Plus, DP regular, Superfan James makes headlines!  In other irresponsible headline interpretations, there's a battle brewing over cold beer sales in Indiana, and Paul geeks out over the upcoming CW Black Lighting pilot.  All this, plus the Facebook question of the week, augmented reality, how government really operates, and hot soup. 





Monday, March 27, 2017

Episode 112 -- Don't Panic About Casino Royale!


What do Trump supporters and Patriots fans have in common?  What happens when you put bulletproof coffee in a Styrofoam cup?  How does a phone work?  And what do you do when you need a tux yesterday?  The answers to these questions and more are in this week's episode of Don't Panic!  Plus, Steve tells Paul about his epic smack down battle with an old man at a formal fundraiser.  
 
All this, plus irresponsible headline interpretations: Tim Allen vs Anne Frank, George Clinton vs terrorists, Art Carney...CIA assassin, and the Revenge of Barack Obama...this time, it's personal.
 
And if that weren't enough, there's an all-new Facebook question of the week!



Monday, March 20, 2017

Episode 111 -- Self-Driving Cars Don't Want You to Know This Secret!


You never forget your first.  First kiss, first girlfriend, first car, but in this episode, your humble hosts talk about their first concerts.  It's also their Facebook question of the week!  Also in this episode, Steve's in-laws are concerned about his drug habit, while Paul can't seem to buy small baggies.  The Don't Panic boys discuss herbs, and come to find out they've both pretended to be deaf in the past with hilarious results.  Plus headlines!  Who's your BBC daddy?  Would a self-driving car kill Hitler or Churchill?  What's the deal with Emma Watson?  Dr. Manhattan, savior of the world, or old, dirty, blue bastard?  All this and Eddy Money at a strip club!

Just click the link below!


Now, follow us on YouTube!

Sunday, March 12, 2017

Episode 110 -- Don't Panic About Childhood!



Favorite childhood toys.  We all had them.  On this week's episode, Steve and Paul ask their Facebook friends what were their favorite toys from childhood?  Also in this episode, Paul finally tells Steve about the girl-on-girl pillow fight he missed, and reveals his brief, happy childhood.  Your humble hosts discuss childhood boredom, Legos, trying to fit tents back in the box, running (Why would anybody do it?), and today's headlines.  Are nude pics a big deal?  What do Hitler and George W. Bush have in common?   How do you write a best seller?  Is America experiencing a Refractory Period?  The answers may surprise you!

Follow the link below, and above all else, don't panic!

Episode 110! The Refractory Period!

Monday, March 6, 2017

Episode 109 -- Don't Panic About the BBC!


The Watchmen, The Wolverine, Nazi retirement homes on the moon, virtual reality threesomes, and childhood sitcoms are just a few of the topics discussed on this week's episode!  This is what happens when your humble hosts skip a week.  Just follow the link below and enjoy the insanity!

Episode 109! Enter at Your Own Risk!

Thursday, March 2, 2017

Don't Panic! It's the Rough Draft Show!



Your humble hosts of the Don't Panic Radio Show bring you the third installment of our sister podcast, The Rough Draft Show!  Description? What more do we need to say than just, "MP Cavalier". The Indy music scene icon was kind enough to join Paul and Steve to do an MP first: He reads a couple of emotional pieces in this episode. Not surprisingly, both pieces are connected to music. What is surprising is how personal and emotional the whole thing gets. Plus we get to hear about a young up and coming MP and the usual talk about how to write. Thank you for subscribing and telling a friend.

Rough Draft Episode 3 -- An Afternoon with MP!

And while you're at it, don't forget to check out MP's own podcast, the Do It Indy Radio Hour!

Sunday, February 19, 2017

Episode 108 -- Don't Panic About The Oscars!


Episode 108 -- And the Worst Movie of All Time Award Goes To...

Worst Movie of All Time? Go! The Academy Awards are coming up and this is how Paul and Steve rock an Oscar Special. This is your 2017 Oscar pre-party. Hear who the nominees are. Hear Paul and Steve's picks. Find out why Paul hated Arrival and Steve thought it was okay. Also hear why Steve is picking Moonlight and Hidden Figures to win big this year. And MOST IMPORTANTLY: Hear whether you made the cut with your Worst Movie of All Time entry. Listen. Laugh. Think. Share. Repeat. dontpanicradioshow.com

Monday, February 13, 2017

Episode 107 -- Don't Panic about Hackronyms!

Episode 107 -- Don't Panic About Hackronyms!

Steve and Paul are sick of Hackronyms. Acronyms that hacks use just to seem smarter. Actually, Steve and Paul are sick of people who use Hackronyms. STEM set Steve off on a "what's wrong with education" rant. As a result, the Question of the Day was "Favorite movie about school? Go!"